A lot of people ask me this question, why do I ride? I drive from Oceano to make the 5:55 AM class and my favorite ride is Monday morning! I did not grow up in a physically or mentally healthy environment and I brought that into my adulthood. I had my son when I was 19 so I essentially brought him into my madness. I have struggled with depression, anxiety and PTSD since I was young. I spent most of my teenager years doing drugs and all of my 20s drinking into an oblivion. Before I got sober, I couldn’t even look at myself in the mirror. I hated myself, which resulted in tremendous damage to myself and others I loved. When I hit my bottom, which thankfully was a hard and painful bottom, I cried out and haven’t had the urge to abuse myself since. So there’s that…
I honestly can’t remember when I started riding at cycletribe, maybe June-ish, and even though I spin here 3-4 times a week, I still get super stoked every time I reserve my spot for the 5:55 AM Tribe Ride! I am still in my honeymoon phase with cycletribe, but I don’t see that changing any time soon. I’ve also recently finished the instructor training course and am working on preparing for my first community ride!
Prior to cycletribe, I was practicing a lot of hot yoga, bootcamp, and barre which I still do, but prior to that I was a runner. I loved the cardio and “runner’s high” I would get from running long distances: just me and my music. Zoning out and making my brain shut off has always been a goal to strive for when I exercise. But the impact of running started to make my joints and bones ache. After taking a short hiatus from running after having surgery, I tried to ease back into my routine. Having the break from the impact of running made me realize how jacked up and jostled my body felt! I knew I had to find something that would keep me strong, give me that release and provide a quiet mind, but I needed to be gentle to my bones.
After starting cycletribe, I instantly got the endorphin fix I was craving! I have always felt trapped inside a body with a brain that constantly chatters and it hasn’t always been the “self-loving” kind of chatter. While riding, I was able to check out of my brain and check into my body. I felt stronger and healthier. I really started focusing on my breath and tapping into the physical strength and the chatter turned into mental strength. I love the challenge knowing it never gets easier, I can just get better at it.
But this is the best part! I’m happy to report that my son and I are happy and healthy! Well, he’s as happy as a 15-year-old boy can be. I have been sober, physically and mentally, for 3 years. Even though I am not tempted to go back and pick up where I left off, I know it is a daily commitment to stay healthy and happy. I never want to live in darkness again. I believe my struggles are my greatest asset. I never want to live that way again and I never have to. The reason I show up at 5:55 on Monday mornings in particular is because I used to wake up, feeling disappointed I woke up. Now, Monday’s are my very FAVORITE day. It’s the beginning to my beautiful week. It’s impossible to have bad days when you CHOOSE to live in gratitude, every moment of every day.
I feel AH-MAZING after my spin classes! The workout I get from cycletribe gives me the clear mind and energy I need to start my day right. I can completely tell a difference between the mornings I ride and the mornings I don’t. I’m more positive and feel like I got all the “yuck” out of my system. The ride AND the amazing staff help that happen. I feel more mellow and collected and I’ve been told I’m WAY nicer when I get all that energy out.